When I lost control of the car and thought I was going to hit the bus stop, the only thing that ran through my mind was "oh well." No high points/low points flashing through my mind. No consideration for my loved ones. No regrets and no proud moments. Perhaps this is a good thing. Perhaps this means I live correctly. Perhaps it means I'm doing everything right.
But I'm really not.
This year, the ten hours I have spent on university work are matched by the effort to train an offensive Dragon Dance Gyarados and overshadowed by the 40 hours I spent on Voltorb Flip, the 100 hours I spent on the Battle Frontier, and destroyed by the 270 hours I've spent on HeartGold in it's entirety so far.
This year, I decided to expend my time and effort on a girl I immensely disliked, forced myself to like her, and had sex with her despite my previous ideals that I'd never do that with someone I didn't legitimately care about.
This year, I quit playing my guitar and real music to focus on the musical abomination known as National Sunday Law Crisis, and I legitimately enjoy it.
I don't really know what's wrong with me, but I'm getting by alright.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
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